The Good, The Bad and I’m OK

This post has developed over the course of many weeks talking with friends, family and clients. As a FASTer Way To Fat Loss client and now a certified coach I started in the same mindset as my clients. So this “good” and “bad” thinking is what I have worked on for the last 10 months. Letting go of that perfectionist type thinking has led me to a place of freedom over food. I am not perfect, but I am OK. I have had many conversations about progress over perefection throughout the 7 weeks of coaching online and in person. With my last round wrapping up I had final assessments with several clients who used the words : “That’s bad I can’t eat that.”
“I haven’t been eating good, I’ve been bad.”
“I’ve been good sticking to my plan.”
“I’m being good this week and dieting.”

When my husband finally popped off about he can’t have blankity blank to his mom, because it’s bad for me and I am being good, my mouth or top popped off. You can eat whatever you chose to eat. He looked at me puzzled. Just like many of my clients and me 10 months ago he had the same mindset of good food and bad food.

When we begin to think of food as good and bad we set ourself up for perfectionist thinking. These two words good and bad turn into self talk and you begin judging yourself as good and bad. When in reality we need to take the you out of the thinking and place the thinking onto the food. You want to turn your thinking into healthy and unhealthy food. Thinking this way leads to you speaking this way and a positive mindset, plus your speaking about the food and not you.

Speaking of being good versus bad also leads you into the “all or nothing” mentality. Which again is related to the perfectionist type of thinking. Fear of failure starts to creep into your thoughts. This is the pivotal point of what do you do when you can’t hold yourself up to those strict rules of your next “diet” you are on. When you make an unhealthy food choice how do you feel? What do you do?  Do you tell yourself, “Well I had the cake and chips with lunch, I’ll just start over tomorrow eating good.” This leads to the downward slide of more unhealthy food choices, because you’re thinking I screwed up might as well eat whatever.   No! Stop! Reset at your next meal or moment you must make the food choice.  You have to decide if you are going to make a healthy food choice or an unhealthy food choice.  You must practice self-grace and reset as quickly as possible. Remember that choice does not define you and does not erase all the hard work you have been putting in to get where you are.

Having a perfectionist way of thinking is detrimental to your health mentally and physically. Gauging your sense of self-worth based on being without flaws is unhealthy. The negative, overly critical self-talk will sabotage any goal you have set for yourself.  Fears of judgement, rejection, or failure will creep in with a perfectionist mindset.

You are God’s work. That saying God doesn’t make junk! Well you’re not junk. You are also not bad, nor good, nor perfect. You are wonderfully made and in His image (Genesis 1:27). Psalms 139:14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful…

I do not say that I have already won the race or have already reached perfection. But I am pressing on, striving to lay hold of the prize for which also Christ has laid hold of me. My friends, I don’t feel I have already arrived. But I forget what is behind, and I struggle for what is ahead. I run toward the goal, so I can win the prize of being called to heaven. This is the prize God offers because of what Christ Jesus has done.   Philippians 3:12-14

This verse helps me with forgetting my past mistakes or slips and pressing foward to making healthier choices to live out my purpose in life. That purpose being sharing my faith and the love God has for you and my passion for improving people’s health and wellness.

When it comes to you trying to eliminate your favorite foods or a food group you like and your body needs, you will fail.  You will be excited at the beginning of any program you start.  You will be able to follow the rules and white knuckle it for about 2-3 weeks, then life happens.  You have that moment of what you think is weakness, but it’s not weakness, it is part of the human DNA, we are not perfect.  Perfection will lead to exhaustion and stress.

The moment you give in you begin to feel you have fallen off the “diet wagon”,  is the mindset we are changing with the FASTer Way. What I have learned, along with losing 33 1/2 inches and have been able to maintain this for the last 10 months, is the understanding that I am not on a diet.  The FASTer Way lifestyle is not a diet.  It is not a restrictive food plan.  It is not a calorie depletion type plan or a plan that eliminates a certain food group.  We eat whole foods and as giving up my favorite food, I haven’t.  We save the treats, sweets, dinner rolls (my favorite with butter) or doughnut for Saturday-Leg day!! 

What I have found to be beneficial with the FWTFL lifestyle is the ability to leave on vacation and return without the guilt of “not sticking” to the plan as strictly as I used to with other programs. During my vacation I practiced intermittent fasting and worked out a little, but for the rest I enjoyed the occasional treats and drinks during time with my family everyday.  When I returned from vacation I knew right where to pick up on my carb cycle day and the workout was waiting for me in the portal.   So rewarding being able to have freedom of guilt when it comes to food.

As a FWTFL coach we educate our clients to practice self grace and PROGRESS OVER PERFECTION.   We also practice rest.  Two days a week you will rest.  This means you will rest, do yoga, walk or go get a massage or your nails done.  It is your day to recover and reflect how your week is going. 

Positive mindset and loving the body God created for you will make your days easier to fulfill the plans you are meant for. Give praise and thanks for the strong and healthy body you have, because my dear sister you are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are clothed in strength and dignity and have no fear of the future. …………….Proverbs 31:25

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